Trust Me... I Can't Lie

Believe me, I've tried, but I cannot tell a lie.

Bias Opinions

By 9:44:00 AM , , , , , , , ,

Love is complicated. Love is confusing. Love is often misunderstood. But most importantly, love is relative. What equates real love to you may mean something completely different to someone else. As a result, you can be left with a million different opinions regarding one incident. 

In relationships, those opinions can matter but they can also be dangerous. 

I feel like I rarely tell my friends about the amazing things the guys I've dated have done for me. Or the little things they did often enough for me. However I'm always quick to snitch on if they forgot to call me back or if they didn't pay the entire bill.  So friends who only hear about the bad form opinions based on that. That usually means that every bit of advice they offer moving forward can be tainted by the bad stories they know of. 

How does one remedy this? 
Because I do value some of my friends opinions and I trust that they have my best interest at heart. So what can you do if you feel you're in a similar situation. Stop telling them about all the bad things that happen to you? No. That's just hiding your life from them. You can however be selective. There's levels to this. And we have to learn what's major enough to let our friends in on. 

He cheated. Sharing that with Sally seems rational because that's a big infraction and you may need support figuring out your next step. He forgot to leave the toilet seat down, may be annoying but does Sally really have to know about that?
I myself am much more unforgiving to the guys my friends date then they are. Your friends are going to not like him or judge him based on a very skewed set of negative details. Details that you've given them. And that's not always fair because they're  not getting a complete picture. Learn to keep certain things about your relationship private. Keep certain things between the two of you. Work through them together. And then maybe you can share how you both got past that hurdle. 

But at least you learned to Trust my opinions because you know I Can't Lie. 


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