"The Stages" - Long Distance Relationships

By 7:29:00 PM , , , ,



One of the most challenging relationships to be in, is one that is "long distance". And that's usually because you're dealing with all the normal issues a couple might face while being far apart. 

I can't tell you how many arguments I ended just by kissing the person. And that was only possible because they were in arms reach. 

When you're away from one another, that may be difficult to accomplish.

Although there are countless issues long distance couples face. I find that the most common issue to be Trust. 

Your  significant other being miles and miles away usually forces you to build the trust quickly. Because without it, your relationship will crumble. 

Any long distance relationship requires an enormous amount of trust. In fact, it often requires complete trust. A complete and unwavering belief that your significant other is living their lives respecting you and the relationship. 


You have to reach a solid place in your relationship where you are comfortable with not knowing what your babe is up too at all.

Who they're with? What they're doing? And that can be a beautuful place to reach in any relationship. 

And often in the beginning you do trust them completely. I call this stage, the "we must make this work" phase. During this stage, you both are attentive. You make sure to call. You make sure to email or write. Skype or platforms like it become your favorite activity.

And in this stage, you guys are so proud that you're able to make it work. And though you still miss each other tremendously,  you both are helping each other cope with the distance. 

And then comes Stage 2. The calls become less. It takes weeks to actually write each other back. Life picks up and you both become more and more  intertwined with your respective responsibilities. 

You miss Skype sessions because you're too tired or busy. 

And then the relationship may ease into Stage 3.
By Stage 3, you're pretty much living your life and your relationship takes the backburner. Yes, the one you were so proud of preserving the first few months of being apart...

Well... that relationship is now on the rocks. What was once a strong union, becomes in danger of extinction. And Trust? The coveted component that once held your relationship together is slipping away. 

Fighting is common. Lying is also common. And the complaints on both sides begin to pile up.
What was once a strong, promising and loving relationship now finds itself at the end of the road. How do you turn the car around? 

You do it simply by finding a balance between your old life with that person and your new life wherever you may be. 
How do you find the balance?!

Please check back for Part2 next Friday!

Your relationships at Stage 3... How can you get back to Stage 1.
And I'm excited to share a very Special Poem by Roger Thomas. @soundofmywords
 You'll love it! Trust me... You know I can't lie!

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About the Author

She's Witty. Honest. Funny. Obsessed w/ Soy Chai Latte's and NY Giants Football. She's a paralegal that thinks Beyonce is her sister and J. Cole is her fiance'. But you TRUST her... Because you know she CAN'T LIE.

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